“My child won’t behave.” That’s what I used to think about my child’s behavioral issues. He just won’t mind me. Professionals boldly told me that I needed better parenting skills with my son. “Keep a routine and never tell him ‘no'” were clinical suggestions which made things worse, not better. I had to discipline my child despite his needs in order to keep him from being totally defiant.
My son acted better around other people, yet fell apart at home. Why did he do this? Why did my son have complete meltdowns at home? My heart wrenched every day I watched my child have meltdowns – he was suffering. Kids want to please their parents. My child desperately wanted to please us. He did not want to be “bad” or act-out. My maternal knowledge and love propelled me to seek answers for my son’s behaviors outside of traditional medicine. Parenting advice wasn’t what I needed. No books or theories applied to my parenting situation. I taught Child Development and Parenting and I am currently a licensed counselor. Nothing I knew or tried worked for my son. Something was causing his behaviors and it was not by his choice.
“My child can’t behave.” What a difference that one word has made in my approach to parenting and enjoying my son. I wanted to yell to all the onlookers and judgmental parents that, “My child can’t behave.” Every time he threw a fit at the store, movies, or public places – I wanted to yell this. I wanted other people to allow him to live in their world without judgment, ridicule, or disdain. I wanted people to see that his behaviors were created because of the foods he ate and environmental factors which our society has created for generations. It was not his fault for suffering.
If you see a child struggling, there is a family struggling as well. Learn why kids suffer. Learn how to help a parent (a child) in need. Kids are facing new challenges which traditional parenting and traditional medicine cannot answer. There is hope and there is another way. Learn more in my book, How Do I Help My Child? A Mother’s Mission. Heal our kids and heal your heart for others suffering. We all need to be loved and belong.